| Boy:Tum gaana bahut achcha gaate ho.Gal:Nahi, mein to sirf bathroom singer hoon.Boy:To bulaao na kabhi, mehfil jamaate hain                                           
 
 | teacher-osama ki 5 biwi & 20 bachche.lalu ki 1 biwi aur 9 bachche,to batao kaun achcha? studnt-score to osama ka zyada hai par strike rate lalu ka achcha hai |  |  
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 | Ek bacha paida hote hi nurse se bola-mobile hai kya?Nurse:-hai pr tu kya karega Bacha:kuch nhi bs God ko miss cal krni hai ki me pahunch gya. |  |  
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 | Sindhi Cals News Paper off. 2ask Rate 2 Print 4 Mortuary Clerk:Rs50 Per Word S:"Dada Dead" C:No,Min 5 Words S:OK,Dada dead,Honda 4 Sale! |  |  
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 |  | Pati Patni me ladai ho gai,Pati ghar se chala gya Raat ko phone karke pucha:"Khane me kya he Patni:zaher pati:me der se aunga,tum khakar so JANA |  |  
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 | Teacher student se:Tere pitaji ki karde ne Student:Ji woh PWD chalaunde ne!Teacher:Tera matlab Public Works Department?Student:Na ji na,PWD matlab Pakodeyaan waali dukaan |  |  
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 | 1 Admi Apni biwi se bola-Raja dashrath ki 3 raniya thi.Is hisab se main 2 shadian or kr sakta hu.Biwi-Bas itna yad rakhna k Dropdi k 5 pati bhi they. |  |  
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 | Wife to husband: see breaking news.. 80 yr old man ne shaadi kar li.Husband: sari umar samazdari se bitayi, akhri me bewakufi kar hi di                                 
| Dr.-Kal dawai PEELI thi?Patient-Nahi, wo to LAAL thiDr.(shouted)-Mera matlab KHA LEE thi?Patient-Nahi Doctor Sahab, wo to BHARI thi ! |  
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 | Sir:bacho kasam lo ki kabhi Sharab,cigrete,jua or ladki ko nahi chuoge.Desh k liye jaan doge? Bacche:de denge sir,aisi Jindagi jikar Kya Karenge. |  |  
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 | Sir-Tum Kal school Q nahi aaye?Raj-sir mujhe bird flu ho gya tha.Sir-bird flu to murgiyo ko hota h?Raj-sir aap rozana murga jo banate The.. |  |  
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 | Ek Dehati aurat chequecash karwane bank gyi Clerk:Sign karo Aurat:Kaise?Clerk:Jaise khat kaakhir me karti ho She wrote:AAP K MUNNEKI MAA |  |  
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 | Raabadi ask Lalu:Suniyeji 'Dahi Jamane' ko english me kya bolun? Lalu:Milk was sleepin in the Nightwa,early in the morning it bcom tightwa.! |  |  
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 | Doctor:Agar kisi LADKI ko mirgi ka attack ho to use lambikiss karo,Wo thiq ho jayegi..Student:"Par use attack kaise dilaye jaye?" |  |  
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 | Boy-suit bahut accha pehna hai.Grl-thnxB-Lipstick b acchi lagai hai.G-thnxB-mak up bhi bahut accha kia hai.G-thnx"BHAIYA" B-fir bhi sunder nahi lag rhi ho! |  |  
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 | Son:Papa kya aap kabhi Egypt gaye ho??Papa:Nahi,Par kyu?Son:Toh fir aap itni Khofnaak mummy kaha se laye..                            
 
 | Judge- Aap bahut bahadur hai, aapne us chor ko itna maara. Woman- Mujhe kya pata wo chor hai,mujhe laga mera pati thoda late ghar aaya he!! |  
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 | Premika-Tum to bass apne kaam mai lage rehte ho. meri to koi parwah hi nahi hai tumhe! premi-Oyee pyar karne wale kisi ki parwah nahi karte |  
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 | Tax Officr was laughing while auditing d return file of mallika sherawat, Another officr askd what hapnd?Office Laundry ka bil '7lack' bataya hai. :)-- |  
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 | Janwaro ki Party me Chuha 4 peg Laga K Set tha Billi-Aaj Party Na Hoti to Me Tujhe Kha Jaati.Chuha-Abe chali ja, Nhi to log kahenge ki pi k jaanani ko peet di |  
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 | BETA-Papa,Sab Log Shaadi karke pareshan hai,to Fir Shaadi kyo karte hai?FATHER-Beta,Akkal Badaam khane se Nahi, Thokar khane se Hi Aati ha |  
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 | Ladki apne Boyfrnd se :Mera BachaMera ShonaMujhse Shaadi karoge.?Bolo Baby.?Bfrnd :Tu Mujhe Propose kar rahi he ya adopt. |  
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 | Bhakt: Bhagwanji aap kab kush hote ho, Bhagawan:jab hindi film me vilan ladki ko pakadata hai tab ladki bolti hai please mujhe bhagawan ke liye chod do.                                     
| "Maathe pe lahu,sir pe ret..Wah!Wah! Jara Gaur karna.Mathe pe lahu,sir pe ret. Kyonki PADOSAN ne phool mara. 'GAMLE SAMET." |  
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 | Patni:Wo sharabi dekh rahe ho,10 sal pehle maine usse shadi k liye inkar kiya tha or wo aj tak pi raha hai. Pati:Wah itni lambi celebration. |  
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 | Salesman tension me tha. DEALER-Kya hua? S.MAN-Mai 6 months tour pe tha, biwi Pregnant ho gai DLR-Ab pata chala bina order k maal aye to kaisa lagta hai.. |  
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 | Aadmi Sadhu se bola:-Meri Biwi Bahut Pareshan Karti Hai,Koi Upaay Bataao.Sadhu Bola:-Saale Upaay Hota To Main Sadhu Kyon Bantaa.Hari Om.. |  
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 | Two snakes sitting in the jungle, Female snake tried to kiss the male snake, Suddenly male snake turned and started singing ‘zehar hai ki pyar hai tera chumma’! |  
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 | After finishing MBBS, Dr. Munna start his practice. He checked 1st patient eyes, tongue & ears by torch & finallly said Bole To.. Torch Theek hai |  
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 | Patient: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis k liye? Doctor: ye mera pehla operation hai… Success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye.. |  
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 | TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell “crocodile”? PAPPU : “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L” TEACHER : No, that’s wrong PAPPU : Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!                           
| TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America . PAPPU : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America ? CLASS : PAPPU! |  
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 | LADKI WALE=BETA-DRINK KARTEHO? JI HAAN JUA/SATTA? JI HAAN DANGA-FASAD? JI HAAN SARI NGETIVE BATEIN,KUCH POSITIVE BHI HAI? HIV |  |  
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 | LADKI WALE=BETA-DRINK KARTEHO? JI HAAN JUA/SATTA? JI HAAN DANGA-FASAD? JI HAAN SARI NGETIVE BATEIN,KUCH POSITIVE BHI HAI? HIV  |  |  
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 | EK BIHARI KI MAUT BIJLI GIRNE SE HUI. PAR US KI LAASH HASTE HUE MILI. BHAGWAN NE PUCHHA: AISA KYUN? BIHARI: HUM SOCHA KOI SASURA HUMARI PHOTO |  |  
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 | Mallika at Airport. Bhikhari: behanji 1 rupiya dedo.  Malika gave him 1000 Rs.  Secretary: why U gave him 1000 Rs..?  Malika: pehli bar kisine behan kaha. |  |  
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 | Pati patni se:- kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul gobar jaisa swad hai  Patni(matha peet te hue)Hey bhagwan!Na jane inhone kya-kya khaKe dekhahAI |  
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 | Judge: U r crossing the limits. Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai? Judge: How dare you call me saala? Lawyer: My Lod, I said kaun 'Sa Law' kehta hai? |  
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