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Hindi Joks


ek Aadmi dusre admi ko peet raha tha Aur khud jor jor se ro raha tha. jab logo ne usse pucha ki tum kyo ro raheho to usne kha- jab mai ise chodunga to ye bhi mujhe ise trah pitega.
                       


Why did HARBHAJAN slap Srisanth..?Aftr d match he asked Bhajji Oye Paji, LOG CHLOROMINT KYU KHATE HAIN?Bhajji slapped & said DUBARA MAT POOCHHNA



Jyotishi ladke Ka Haath Dekhkar bola: "Beta Tum Bahut Padhoge"Ladka: "Saale,Padh To Main 3 saal Se Raha Hu, Yeh Bata Paas Kab Hounga...??"


Why did HARBHAJAN slap Srisanth..?Aftr d match he asked Bhajji 'Oye Paji, LOG CHLOROMINT KYU KHATE HAIN?'Bhajji slapped & said 'DUBARA MAT POOCHHNA'



A New Teacher Joins schoolHe Finds Two Boys Similar In Appearance.Teacher asks - "kya TUM Judva ho.??Boy-: jee nahi..Hum Padosi hain.


Teacher : usne khudkhushi kar li, use khudkhushi karni padi, farak batao student : pehla padha likha berojgar tha, dusra shadi-suda tha



MunnaBhai: Teray ko maaloom hai k cigarette aik tarah say slow poison ka kaam karta hai. Patient: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi hai.


Boy:Tum gaana bahut achcha gaate ho.Gal:Nahi, mein to sirf bathroom singer hoon.Boy:To bulaao na kabhi, mehfil jamaate hain                                         

teacher-osama ki 5 biwi & 20 bachche.lalu ki 1 biwi aur 9 bachche,to batao kaun achcha? studnt-score to osama ka zyada hai par strike rate lalu ka achcha hai
    
Ek bacha paida hote hi nurse se bola-mobile hai kya?Nurse:-hai pr tu kya karega Bacha:kuch nhi bs God ko miss cal krni hai ki me pahunch gya.

Sindhi Cals News Paper off. 2ask Rate 2 Print 4 Mortuary Clerk:Rs50 Per Word S:"Dada Dead" C:No,Min 5 Words S:OK,Dada dead,Honda 4 Sale!

Pati Patni me ladai ho gai,Pati ghar se chala gya Raat ko phone karke pucha:"Khane me kya he Patni:zaher pati:me der se aunga,tum khakar so JANA

Teacher student se:Tere pitaji ki karde ne Student:Ji woh PWD chalaunde ne!Teacher:Tera matlab Public Works Department?Student:Na ji na,PWD matlab Pakodeyaan waali dukaan


1 Admi Apni biwi se bola-Raja dashrath ki 3 raniya thi.Is hisab se main 2 shadian or kr sakta hu.Biwi-Bas itna yad rakhna k Dropdi k 5 pati bhi they.

Wife to husband: see breaking news.. 80 yr old man ne shaadi kar li.Husband: sari umar samazdari se bitayi, akhri me bewakufi kar hi di                               
Dr.-Kal dawai PEELI thi?Patient-Nahi, wo to LAAL thiDr.(shouted)-Mera matlab KHA LEE thi?Patient-Nahi Doctor Sahab, wo to BHARI thi !


Sir:bacho kasam lo ki kabhi Sharab,cigrete,jua or ladki ko nahi chuoge.Desh k liye jaan doge? Bacche:de denge sir,aisi Jindagi jikar Kya Karenge.

Sir-Tum Kal school Q nahi aaye?Raj-sir mujhe bird flu ho gya tha.Sir-bird flu to murgiyo ko hota h?Raj-sir aap rozana murga jo banate The..

Ek Dehati aurat chequecash karwane bank gyi Clerk:Sign karo Aurat:Kaise?Clerk:Jaise khat kaakhir me karti ho She wrote:AAP K MUNNEKI MAA

Raabadi ask Lalu:Suniyeji 'Dahi Jamane' ko english me kya bolun? Lalu:Milk was sleepin in the Nightwa,early in the morning it bcom tightwa.!

Doctor:Agar kisi LADKI ko mirgi ka attack ho to use lambikiss karo,Wo thiq ho jayegi..Student:"Par use attack kaise dilaye jaye?"

Boy-suit bahut accha pehna hai.Grl-thnxB-Lipstick b acchi lagai hai.G-thnxB-mak up bhi bahut accha kia hai.G-thnx"BHAIYA" B-fir bhi sunder nahi lag rhi ho!

Son:Papa kya aap kabhi Egypt gaye ho??Papa:Nahi,Par kyu?Son:Toh fir aap itni Khofnaak mummy kaha se laye..                          

Judge- Aap bahut bahadur hai, aapne us chor ko itna maara. Woman- Mujhe kya pata wo chor hai,mujhe laga mera pati thoda late ghar aaya he!!


Premika-Tum to bass apne kaam mai lage rehte ho. meri to koi parwah hi nahi hai tumhe! premi-Oyee pyar karne wale kisi ki parwah nahi karte


Tax Officr was laughing while auditing d return file of mallika sherawat, Another officr askd what hapnd?Office Laundry ka bil '7lack' bataya hai. :)--


Janwaro ki Party me Chuha 4 peg Laga K Set tha Billi-Aaj Party Na Hoti to Me Tujhe Kha Jaati.Chuha-Abe chali ja, Nhi to log kahenge ki pi k jaanani ko peet di


BETA-Papa,Sab Log Shaadi karke pareshan hai,to Fir Shaadi kyo karte hai?FATHER-Beta,Akkal Badaam khane se Nahi, Thokar khane se Hi Aati ha


Ladki apne Boyfrnd se :Mera BachaMera ShonaMujhse Shaadi karoge.?Bolo Baby.?Bfrnd :Tu Mujhe Propose kar rahi he ya adopt.


Bhakt: Bhagwanji aap kab kush hote ho, Bhagawan:jab hindi film me vilan ladki ko pakadata hai tab ladki bolti hai please mujhe bhagawan ke liye chod do.                                   
"Maathe pe lahu,sir pe ret..Wah!Wah! Jara Gaur karna.Mathe pe lahu,sir pe ret. Kyonki PADOSAN ne phool mara. 'GAMLE SAMET."


Patni:Wo sharabi dekh rahe ho,10 sal pehle maine usse shadi k liye inkar kiya tha or wo aj tak pi raha hai. Pati:Wah itni lambi celebration.


Salesman tension me tha. DEALER-Kya hua? S.MAN-Mai 6 months tour pe tha, biwi Pregnant ho gai DLR-Ab pata chala bina order k maal aye to kaisa lagta hai..


Aadmi Sadhu se bola:-Meri Biwi Bahut Pareshan Karti Hai,Koi Upaay Bataao.Sadhu Bola:-Saale Upaay Hota To Main Sadhu Kyon Bantaa.Hari Om..


Two snakes sitting in the jungle, Female snake tried to kiss the male snake, Suddenly male snake turned and started singing ‘zehar hai ki pyar hai tera chumma’!


After finishing MBBS, Dr. Munna start his practice. He checked 1st patient eyes, tongue & ears by torch & finallly said Bole To.. Torch Theek hai


Patient: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis k liye? Doctor: ye mera pehla operation hai… Success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye..


TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell “crocodile”? PAPPU : “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L” TEACHER : No, that’s wrong PAPPU : Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!                         
TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America . PAPPU : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America ? CLASS : PAPPU!


LADKI WALE=BETA-DRINK KARTEHO? JI HAAN JUA/SATTA? JI HAAN DANGA-FASAD? JI HAAN SARI NGETIVE BATEIN,KUCH POSITIVE BHI HAI? HIV

LADKI WALE=BETA-DRINK KARTEHO? JI HAAN JUA/SATTA? JI HAAN DANGA-FASAD? JI HAAN SARI NGETIVE BATEIN,KUCH POSITIVE BHI HAI? HIV

EK BIHARI KI MAUT BIJLI GIRNE SE HUI. PAR US KI LAASH HASTE HUE MILI. BHAGWAN NE PUCHHA: AISA KYUN? BIHARI: HUM SOCHA KOI SASURA HUMARI PHOTO

Mallika at Airport. Bhikhari: behanji 1 rupiya dedo. Malika gave him 1000 Rs. Secretary: why U gave him 1000 Rs..? Malika: pehli bar kisine behan kaha.

Pati patni se:- kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul gobar jaisa swad hai Patni(matha peet te hue)Hey bhagwan!Na jane inhone kya-kya khaKe dekhahAI


Judge: U r crossing the limits. Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai? Judge: How dare you call me saala? Lawyer: My Lod, I said kaun 'Sa Law' kehta hai?

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